After an hour at the piano, there is ordinary business to attend to.  I pay some bills.  I read the disco trade papers.  I call our agent about holding a concert at a nearby college.  Then I make my weekly call to the US Patent office.

Me: US Patent office?  WAZZZZUUUUUP! Hahahahahaha!

US Patent Office: <Silence>

Me: hahahahahahaha!  I need to patent two business names.  One: Funeral Masters.  Two: Mr. Funeral.

US Patent Office:  You can't do that, sir.

Me: Ah hah.  I see.   Tell you what sweetheart, why don't you go ahead and put a man on the phone?  Hello!?!

US Patent Office:  Yes, sir.

Me: I thought you hung up.

US Patent Office: <silence>

Me: Did you hang up now?

US Patent Office: No.

Me: Okay, goodbye.